Here’s the story of why I wanted – or felt I needed – to start this blog.
Over the years I’ve had the same conversation many times with girls (I’m not trying to be sexist, it just has been mainly with girls) that has stuck in my head time and time again.
It involves the conversations where the girl in question would say (in response to something I had done, or she wanted to do):
“Oh I’d love to do that, but I never could.”
“I can’t just go and do X!”
(When X is quitting your job, going travelling, releasing a friendship that has ended, etc…)
Whenever I had those conversations, I’d be seized by a rage inside me. I wanted to stand up and shout at them: “OF COURSE YOU CAN! DON’T BE SO STUPID! THE FACT THAT YOU ARE TELLING YOURSELF THAT YOU CAN’T, MEANS THAT YOU NEVER WILL! GRR!”
Of course, I didn’t say this to them. That would be mean (and I also don’t think they’re stupid – this is my anger talking. I am working on my own internal dialogue, incidentally!)
But I would look at them with absolute confusion on my face. How can someone defeat themselves, before they’ve even started? It used to make me so sad!
Because here is what I’ve found is the truth:
- If I’ve done it, then you most certainly can.
- We ALL have excuses we can use (I have a mortgage… I have a cat… I don’t have the confidence…)
- You are never too old to start something.
- What’s your 70-year-old self, or the you on your deathbed going to say? “Ah, thank god I played it safe, and didn’t follow those dreams!”
More likely: “I wish I’d had the guts to just get out there and do something, even though I was scared.”
So this blog is for those girls who made me sad… the ones who wanted to do something but didn’t feel that they could.
Okay, so you might not be an Olympic gymnast at the age of 40. But you can still enjoy having a few gym lessons – or you could pursue another sport that might lead you to the Olympics… marathon running? Or you might not have the physical capabilities to go travelling on the other side of the world. But what about the other side of your country?
And to get round the excuses part: I’d recommend talking to your most positive friend, or the most positive person you know. Ask them to brainstorm ideas to get round the excuses you’ve created in your head. They might suggest things you’ve never thought of, or give you ideas on how you can move on to the next step. Hurrah!
Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not trying to be patronizing. It took me about six months just to get this blog started. But at least I am trying!
And a final note: you cannot imagine the joy I felt when I heard from someone who I’d had one of those conversations with, and they had gone on and done the thing they wanted to do.
What a fantastic feeling…
of having a dream… being scared to do it… but going after it anyway!
And here’s a challenge for you…
What’s your secret dream, deep inside?
How are you going to move one tiny, fairy-sized step closer towards that dream? (A tiny step still moves you along the direction you want to be going in!)